Hey there,

I hope you had a Happy Thanksgiving! And I hope you found, and continue to find, a million things to be grateful for.

In today’s newsletter, I want to talk about a topic near and dear to my heart, becoming. So, let’s dive in.

On Becoming…

“Becoming is rarely graceful.”

I wrote this phrase the other day while reflecting on my life journey so far. After I wrote it, I kind of just sat there and stared at it for a few minutes, thinking about how it couldn’t be more true.

It feels like becoming happens slowly and then all at once. In the beginning, when you’re trying so hard to align your thoughts and actions with the person you want to be, it feels like nothing is changing. And then, one day, a few months, years, or even decades later, you wake up one morning, and it feels like everything has changed.

And when you think about how it happened, you go back through everything it took to get where you are. You wonder how that slow start compounded into monumental change so quickly.

Becoming happens slowly and then all at once. But in between, it’s far from graceful.

The path to becoming who you want to be is filled with adversity, reflection, and deep questioning. The process can make you feel like you’re swimming upstream. And with the resistance of the current, it’s easy to start wondering if what you want and who you want to be is meant for you.

But resistance isn’t always a bad thing. In fact, resistance is often a really good thing. As the saying goes, if it were easy, everyone would do it. But what’s more important about resistance is that it’s meant to remind you of what you’re fighting for. It’s meant to bring out that warrior inside you. It’s meant to make you prove to yourself how badly you really want what you say you want.

Why do you want to become the person you want to be?

Why do you want that degree? Why do you want to move across the country? Why do you want that career?

What and who are you fighting for?

Resistance isn’t the enemy; it’s the catalyst for your inspiration. And it’s there to make you think about how much you truly want to become who you want to be. Because becoming means enduring. Becoming means sacrificing. Becoming isn’t graceful.

Becoming also means that something must be left behind, whether old habits, old perspectives, fears, wrong identities, or even loved ones. And leaving behind those things can be uncomfortable and painful.

But the suffering doesn’t last forever. Why? Because even though it feels like it’s happening slowly, it’s also happening all at once. And amidst the pain and discomfort, massive growth is happening.

There will come a day when you wake up, look in the mirror, and see that person you always wanted to be. The person you worked so hard to be. She is there. She is you.

I know that it can be hard to fathom how you’re going to become the version of yourself you want to be when you feel like you’re so far away. Or when you feel like the discomfort is too much to handle. But you can handle it. The person you are becoming knows that you can make it through.

Transformation is a lot of hard work, and self-critism only makes it harder. Be kind to yourself as you navigate your journey of becoming. Remember that it's not about perfection, and it’s rarely graceful. Even though it feels hard and slow in the beginning, soon, you’ll look into the mirror and be in awe of just how fast it happened.

Until next time, keep going and keep growing.

Coach Tay

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